Journey to the End of My Life
by AccendoAnimus
Summary: Giving up Alchemy was the hardest thing Ed ever went through;it had been his entire life. Determined that the secrets of the world could bring back his lost power, he sets off on a journey alone that will test his will and determination.Winry, tired of being left behind,chases after Ed, determined to help him.Ed will soon realize that not everything in the world must be equivalent.
1. Restless & Useless

Hey, this is my second story. Check out my other one! But anyways, i was totally unsatisfied with the ending. So i decided to continue on. This, i think, will be a long story. Welcome to the ride, ladies and gentlemen.

-Im here to enkindle courage

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After he steps onto the train, he looks back and sees her waving at him. And his gut tells him that it's going to be a while before he can feel her in his arms again. He watches as the train moves farther and farther from the house that he had spent the last two years of this life. A ping of guilt and remorse fills him. He doesn't want to leave her, but he wants to find his place in the world again. Maybe someday, he'll look back and still regret leaving now, but maybe someday, just maybe, he'll be thankful that he had. Turning around with a new sense of determination, Edward Elric takes a deep breath and goes to find his seat. After he sits down he starts to think. _I hope she waits for me, though I doubt she will. She's almost 18 and, well, people start looking for spouses then… I finally tell her my feelings and she tells me she feels the same way too. Al was right. Ha, I guess that kid has to know something, sometimes. But then I just go and leave her again! She better not cry. I promise the next time she crys, it will be because I'm back for good. Please wait Winry._

After thinking about everything, Ed figures that he should pull out his map to determine when he would need to get off. _Well, I'm going to have to stop in Central to renew my papers…I should pick up some new clothes too. Resembool isn't the best place to shop for clothes. And maybe Ill go see Colonel Asshole and them. Ha, they'll be surprised to see me. I should also pick up some money from the bank, who knows when I'll see one again. _Ed looks at the passing hills outside of his window. He watches them fall and rise and fall and rise. Soon he finds himself daydreaming about times when he was younger. Running around with Al, chasing some lead. He laughs as he remembers the many stray cats that Al tried to keep, much to Ed's displeasure. He starts to think about everybody who had helped him and Al on their long journey; Winry, the old bat, Colonel Asshole, Ling, Greed, Doctor Marco, Riza and the other soldiers, the gorilla and lion guys, even his father. He never really thanked them all properly, but he hopes that they know how thankful he is. He hopes that he can help people like they helped him. But at the moment, Ed feels uneasy about this and his decision.

_I wish I could just jump ahead to see whether or not I should do this. I wish I could be able to see how my life turns out because of this. Will she hate me for leaving her again? Do I lose everything? Do I turn out alright? Couldn't I just go to the very end and look and see what I need to do? Ha, that's wishful thinking Ed. This is real, not some made up story. _He continues to think until he manages to fall asleep, the rattling on the train tracks in his ears.

You see, Edward Elric has grown restless. Staying in one place was not for him; well, not at this time in this life. After traveling around for most of his youth, he, now a 17 year old, thinks its time to continue on. But what Edward won't admit to anyone, including himself, is that he feels useless without his alchemy. He was known as the youngest state alchemist; a fearless warrior and an expert on all matters alchemy. What is he now? A 17 year old who lives with an elder lady, who can't hold a job down for more than a week, can't cook, and can't even fix a hole in the roof without screaming in frustration. He's determined to figure out how to get his alchemy back, even if he has to face God himself. But he doesn't regret giving up his alchemy for Al's body, not even in the darkest parts of his heart. He feels joy and pride in him when he thinks about it. But he does feel sad that he had to lose apart of himself to get Al back. He misses his alchemy and he's determined to figure out how to get it back. And Edward Elric never gives up. Never. But what Mister Elric doesn't know, is that this adventure, is going to be a hell of a ride.

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Not bad, right? Well brace yourselves. Here we go!

-AccendoAnimus


	2. Colonel Asshole

Kay, so in case it isnt clear, Ed is 17. Now six feet tall. He still wears the same clothes though. He hasnt been anywhere but Resembool for the past two years. Anyways, enjoy!

-Im here to enkindle courage :)

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"Excuse me, sir? Sir? Sir!"

Edwards eyes flashed open and met a pair of blue ones. He had been sleeping for a long time, he could tell. It was already getting close to dusk and he had left Resembool at dawn.

"Whhha?" Ed begins to yawn.

"We have arrived at Central, you asked me to wake you when we got here." The bright eyed lady smiled at him, " Would you like me to help you with your bags?"

"No no, I've got it. Thanks though." He flashes her a big smile and grabs his bag and throws it over his shoulder. Waving at over his shoulder he says, "Thanks a lot. Food still sucks on there though." She laughs and waves back. _He reminds me of someone, but no. That boy was a short thing. _

Ed begins to walk toward the military base, which has been moved from where it had been when they fought Father. The ground had proved too unstable for them to keep a building on. The new Fuhrer was still deciding to what to do. Apparently, the general public wants to put in a large lake in it and grow a park around it. _Well, that would make all of Fathers secrets inaccessible to the public. That's a good idea. _

Ed walks by a clothing store and decides that's where he will make his first stop. He bought a red cloak but could put the Elric crest on the back of it because he can't paint, nor transmute it on. _Another god damn reason I miss alchemy. _His good mood began to decline at the thought. Leaving the store with some new clothing, he began to walk toward the base. _I wonder if Cornel asshole is here. Mhmm, maybe I can guilt him into letting me stay in the base. _Ed chuckles as he walks up the stairs into the base. As he begins to walk down the hallway, two guards step in his way.

"Where do you think you're going?" They glare at him.

"To talk to Cornel As—Mustang."

"Do you have an appointment? Only authorized military personal are allowed past this point."

"I am authorized! I'm a state—" His face fell. Ed had resigned when he could no longer perform alchemy. "Well, I **was **a state alchemist. I'm Edward Elric."

"Hahaha! No way! I've seen Fullmetal and he's a pipsqueak. No way you're him. Get lost." The guards both laughed before Ed punched them.

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING A PIPSQUEEK? I'm ALMOST 6 FEET TALL!" He begins to wail on the two guards until he is restrained by other patrolling guards.

"What in heavens name in going on here? And can my muscles fix it?"

_Oh no. It's…_

"No, sir, Major Armstrong! Just dealing with some rabble that tried to pass himself of as Fullmetal, sir!"

"Fullmetal… You mean Edward Elric?" The major shoved over the other guards and leaned down to look into Edwards eyes. "Edward Elric, you're a dwarf!"

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING A DWARF YOU VAIN BABY MAN!" Ed fights against the guards restraining him and continues to throw insults at people while the major turns to the guards.

"You can release him boys. This is defiantly Edward Elric. No one else gets that angry when you call them short. Haha!" Immediately after Edward is released he is pulled and crushed in to the arms of Armstrong. Then the water fall of tears, and shirt tearing happens. "Edward! I knew you couldn't stay away any longer from my beautifully shaped muscles. I mean look at them! They are even better than before! And—" The major continues to strangle Ed and ramble on about his muscles. But then Ed, thankfully, is released.

"Where do you get off—"Ed is cut off by more of Armstrong's talking,

"Cornel Mustang, sir!" Armstrong salutes to someone behind him. Ed turns around to see Mustang standing behind his. But Mustang isn't wearing his normal arrogant , cocky face. He looks confused.

"Major, who were you trying to strangle?"

"It hasn't really been that long, Cornel Asshole." Ed fake salutes at the Cornel and smirks.

"Fullmetal? No way but… youre not a pipsqeek, anymore!" As the Cornel looks at him in disbelief, Ed dramatically leans against the wall pouting. _I wasn't that short…_

"What are you doing here?" Mustang asks him.

"What, I'm not allowed to come and bug you when I want?" Ed walks away from the wall towards Mustang. _Damn, he's still taller by an inch or so. _

"No. And it's been two years! Why are you here now?"

"Well Mustang, that's what I want to talk to you about. Can we go speak in private? But the Major can come too if he wants, I guess."

"Sure shorty, this way." Mustang turns from where he has come and nodded for Armstrong and Ed to come. He smirked at Ed. Arrogant and cocky are defiantly back.

"WHY ARE YOU CALLING SHORT YOU BLACK HAIRED, USELESS IN THE RAIN, ASSHOLE!"

"Calm down, Elric, before you make the whole building come running toward the commotion. Here's my office." Mustang turned into a doorway and waited for them to get in. He then closed the door and went to sit down on a chair. The other men followed in suit.

"So what is it, Fullmetal?"

"You shouldn't call me that anymore; I'm not a state alchemist." Ed said with a tinge of sadness. But then he looked up at Major and Mustang with fire in his eyes. "But that's exactly what I'm trying to become again."

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Im excited about this story. I hope you are too! :)


	3. He's Growing Up

No reviews yet :( Sad face. Well, i hope they'll come soon. Please?

-Im here to enkindle courage

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"So you think that the country west of Creta has the answers? What the hell makes you think that?" Mustang had just listened to Ed's plea for a borderpass and his documents, without the standard 6 month waiting period. Ed then had explained that he wanted to go even further west than Creta, to a country few people know the name of.

"Well think of this, we have Alchemy, Xing had Alchehestry, what do they have? They probably have their own secrets like we have ours. My goal is to find out those secrets and to be able to gain my door back from God. I mean, theyre a powerful nation. So powerful that no one could stand against them. But never in their history have they ever tried to invade, or even start a war. I want to find out why. Maybe their power and prosperity only runs as far as their borders, or maybe they have everything they could ever need there. And we don't even have a lot of information on them, even though they welcome trade and traveling. But it seems no one knows anything about there. Hell, I don't even know its name. Do you know?" Ed looks toward Mustang who shrugs his shoulders. But surprisingly, Armstrong answers him.

"Well, my great grandmother travelled their in her youth and brought back a basic information book. I believe the name is Rochen. Their government is a democratic and capitalist. They don't have many taxes there because most people are very wealthy. However, those who aren't very wealthy work for the rich and live in their homes as servants. But they are not slaves! No no. This book only said good things. And I would let you it but…. it was destroyed when we hid the Brig's soldiers in the mansion."

Ed and Mustang both groan in disappointment. _Dammit. That book probably had a translation text in it. I didn't even think of the language barrier! _

"So you're planning to go alone for this whole journey?" Mustang asks becoming serious again.

"People get hurt around me. I don't want that anymore. I have to go alone."_ So many people have gotten hurt or died around me because of my first journey. I will make it so that no one has to die on this one. _Ed almost falls into a flashback state about all the people that had sacrificed for him and Al. But then he gets an interruption from the Major.

"But…nevermind" Armstrong starts but falters at the end.

"What?"

"But Edward, you do not have your alchemy anymore. How will you survive if you fight?" Armstrong didn't ask how Ed had survived for two years without it not even for fighting. _How did he let go such a big part of his life. It was apart of him. More than a limb is. He breathed, ate and slept alchemy. He was an expert on the subject and he was only 15. Imagine what he would be like at 30, or 40?_

"Haha, what did you think, Major? That I sat around getting fat for two years? No. I trained myself in certain weapons and tactics. I'll be fine." _Though I've never fought anyone in a real fight with them. I practiced on dummy's I made when that old bat wasn't watching. _

"What tactics exactly?" Questions Mustang. _This kid has something special about him. If I had lost my alchemy, I would've lost my sanity. Alchemy was his life and soul. He gave it up for his brother's body. He never gave up on him. I guess that says another thing about him. An ambitious, determined and hardworking teenager? I've never heard that sentence before. What he's gone through his whole life would have broken most people. But here he is, telling us he's mastered even more things. History will remember Edward Elric. And that's something that I will bet my life on. _

"Hand to hand, obviously. Bradley always looked cool with a sword and so did Ling… so the sword. I can also use firearms. But I've never shot anyone before." _I've always known hand to hand, but those other skills took forever to hone, especially since I wasn't used to having two flesh arms. _

"But Edward, you don't seem to have any weapons on your person… nor do you have a permit." Armstrong begins to doubt how much thought went into this plan. _As determined as he is, he still goes in eyes flaming. He needs to sit and think. He has the time now. There is no rush. _

"Weeeelll, that's another thing that I need to ask from you guys. Hey! Don't give me that look asshole! I saved the freaking country. I thought I could ask a few favors without the hassle." _Well I had to leave them behind or Winry would never have let me leave! She's always worried about me!_

"Fullmetal! You are asking me to waive documentation rules for you, give you a borderpass, and now this! Who do you think you are?" Mustang yells in frustration. _Do you know what you are getting into, kid? This is some serious stuff to be dealing with. You could be taken captive crossing Creta, or killed. You even could get stranded in Rochen! _

"I'm a kid trying to find the right path for his life again. You have everything set mustang. You'll become Fuhrer soon and then marry Riza! You know what you're doing. Please help me try to find my way; I will pay you back one day. I promise." Ed smirks after he says that. "I'll pay you back once this country is democratic again."

But Mustang hadn't heard anything past the Riza part. _How does he know my intentions with her? __**She**__ doesn't even know my intentions with her! No one should know! I've never spoken aloud those feelings and neither has she, well, if she has those feelings! How does he know when __**I**__ don't even know!_

"How… how did you know about Riza?" He side glances toward the Major, who is trying very hard to not listen. _Lalalalalala! My muscles are amazing and my one hair is amazing! The whole world will see the might of the Armstrong muscles and hair! I mean who wouldn't want to-_ And with that, the Major had full distracted himself in thoughts of himself.

"Ha, come on. I've known you both long enough to know. I heard she wanted Lust to kill her after she found out you were dying. And then I heard that you ran to protect her on the promised day when she was dying. I also heard you held her in your arms and gazed deep into—" Mustang proceeded the singe the only facial hair Ed had. _Jesus, he noticed and remembered all of that? Doesn't that brain of his get too full? I wonder what else he's figured out in his time. This brat is a force to be reckoned with. Good luck dealing with him in Rochen, people. He's an interesting kid. _

"OUCH! What the hell?" _Suuuuuch an asshole. When I get my alchemy back, he will defiantly pay for that! _

"That was enough, Elric. Just don't go spreading that around. Fraternization doesn't look good on a resume for Fuhrer." He glances at the boy rubbing his face. "Fine, I'll help you. But you better come back a god damn alchemist or don't come back at all!

"Trust me colonel . I'll come back an alchemist just so I can kick your ass."

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Well, there you have it. Please review!

:)


	4. Drunken Words Are Sober Thoughts

Hey guys :) Thanks for reading this story. I really love this chapter. Anyways, enjoy.

Im here to enkindle courage.

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"Alright kid, here are all the papers. Along with some money we all pitched in to give you so you can have a safe trip. Its from all of us". Says Jean Havoc as he lights a smoke.

Everyone had gathered in Mustang's office to have a 'Welcome Back/Going Away Party' for Ed. Everyone smiled at Ed as he took the money. Everyone had given him something else though at the party, along with money. Jean had bought Ed a book named 'How to Understand the Female Mind', which everyone laughed at. Denny Brosh and Maria Ross had bought a camera in which he took a picture of everyone and then gave it to Ed. "So you can show us all the crazy shit you get into when we aren't around." Maria said as she gave it to him. Vato Falman and Heymans Breda bought Edward their favorite cookies that they had discovered. They brought enough to last the trip, but by the end of the night, most had been eaten. Sheska also bought a book for him. It was one of the few books on the western parts of Creta and had some information about Rochen in it. Kain fury gave Edward a prototype spy camcorder he had. He had concealed it into pin shaped into the Elric crest that Edward could wear on his chest. It would record everything that it saw and was solar powered. He also gave Ed something that would allow him to 'hook it up' and watch it later. Alex Armstrong bought Edward a miniature statue of Alex. This amused everyone until the shirt ripping and the muscle bulging began. Mustang and Riza both gave the most special gifts Ed received that night, though he wouldn't let Mustang know. Riza had stolen Ed's red jacket from his room and bought some black dye. Then Mustang had transmuted them both into the red coat with the Elric symbol on the back. As Ed unwrapped the gift, in the center of the coat, was his old state alchemist pocket watch. "Don't forget, 3. Oct. 10" was still written inside of it. He looked at both Mustang and Riza and nodded. They both understood that meant that he was extremely grateful for the gift.

The night was full of laughter, drinking, card playing and reminiscing. Edward won most of the card games after two years of practicing with the two card sharks named Winry and Granny, much to the displeasure of Kain, Vato and Breda who were convinced he was cheating. Much of the drinking was done by Havoc as he tried numerous times to convince Riza to 'ditch the crazy flame dude and come hang out for a while' which ended up with him nursing a black eye and singed eyebrows from Mustang. Poor Sheska was caught into the mighty arms of Alex Armstrong and had to humor the man about his muscles until she remembered something she read about the Armstrongs once using steroids to have their muscles, which lead into a conversation with him. A few hours pass and eventually everyone has become extremely intoxicated and start spewing out random things that they could all do. Well, everyone except for Mustang who had an early meeting the next morning. Eventually, the group wanders out toward the back field outside of headquaters and decide that it would be a good idea to have a bonfire. However Mustang and Riza stay behind a bit to clean some of the mess the other drunken fools had made.

"Why did i let the party happen in **my **office?" Mustang groans and he barley does any actual work. Riza plops down into the couch that had been brought into the party and lays on her back.

"Because shhirr, i tolds you to." Riza slurs as her smile turns into a smirk as he turns to face him.

"Why do you hate me, you crazy drunk woman?" Mustang mutters as he picks up a half empty beer bottle and throws it into the trash.

"Come on Musdang. You knows I don't hates you. But it wazz a good idea to has the party for Elrard becaushe he has a long journay aheads of him."

"Jesus Riza," Mustang turns to her slightly shocked. "I haven't seen you this drunk in...well... never! What the hell?"

"Well shir, I'm always worring about yous. I cants ever stop watchings you or you might fuck ups. But shince there are so many peoples here tonight and you arents drinking... i thoughts you could handle this one by yourself." She smiles lazily at his as she puts her hands behind her head. " And beshides, im not evens that drank." _She actually worries that much about me? I never knew... Does that mean that she stops herself from having fun because I'm always goofing off? _He frowns at her, but soon is laughing at the face that she is making at him.

"Take that frown off, mishter grumpy pants!"

Mustang laughs and sits at the end of the couch, moving her legs to lay across his lap. "Haha, yes you are drunk, Hawkeye. Yes you are. And hey! I don't need anyone watching out for me! I'm the freaking flame alchemist!"

"What happens if it rains, shir?" She laughs.

"Well... i have...um... right! There you go, Riza. Have a glass of water." He says as he tries to confuse her, in which he succeeds.

"You what? What water?"

"What are you talking about Riza?" Mustang tries had not to laugh at the confused look on the normally emotionally lacking blonde's face. Eventually she starts laughing and he joins in because of her infectious laugh.

"Why...why are ... are we laughing, Riza?" Mustang says between laughs.

"Well because shir, we haven't been alone like thish in a while and all you're doing is confushing me. Hahaha"

He begins to remember the last time they were alone. He had been trying, without success to button up his shirt. He had been rather hung over that morning and had made it into his office without anyone noticing. Other than the Hawk's Eye however.

"Sir." She saluted and then sniffed the air. "You smell like alcohol. What were you doing last night?" She looked at him with demanding eyes and he knew he was done for but he still wouldn't give up without a fight. _God damn woman. Can't she just mind her own business?_

"That would be none of your business, lieutenant." He said harsher than her had meant to. He looked at her and saw a little bit of hurt flash through her eyes but then it was gone. She pulled out her gun and pointed it at him. He sighed.

"Why?"

"Because you ordered me to pull my gun on you if you jeopardized your future as Furher. Coming to work, hung over for no good reason, is unapproved. Now tell me why, sir." She demands.

_I was done for from the start._

Mustang looked over to Riza and he knew he was about to break. He looked away and slumped against the wall. She sighed and put her gun away and knelt in front of him. She then removed his crossed arms and unbuttoned his shirt with the full intention of buttoning them back up properly afterword, but he caught her hands with his.

"I dreamt of that night… that night I killed Lust. I couldn't forget it. So I got out of bed and went to my kitchen and saw that picture of us before your father died on my fridge. It made me remember when lust had cornered you and almost killed you. Then like a flash, every single time you have been hurt flew through my eyes… ending with that crazy doctor slowly killing you in front of me so I would do that human transmutation. I couldn't do anything and you were just…dying. I remember holding you in my arms and watching the life slowly drift out of you and…." He stopped when he realized that Riza was hugging him; hugging him hard. He also realized that he had tears streaming down his face. "And so…I grabbed the liquor I keep in my pantry and just… drank all of it." He hugged her back, and be began to feel wetness on the side of his neck. He pulled back and realized that Riza too, had been crying.

Never before had he seen her tears. Not when her father died, not during the war, not when he burned the secrets of flame alchemy off her back… but here she was, crying. "Riza…why are you crying?" Roy Mustang was shocked beyond belief. "Because… because you're such an idiot, Roy." She laughed through her tears. "Why would you get upset over me?"

"Riza, you're the most important person to me in the world. If anything happened to you…" His voice cracked. _Stop thinking about that. _

"…You mean that? I thought… I thought that you just considered me an ally, maybe a friend. I didn't know…"

"Seriously, Riza? After all these years… maybe a friend? Riza Hawkeye, I don't think I have ever heard you say anything that stupid before." He laughed at her and wiped away the fresh tears falling down her face. "Riza Hawkeye, you are my most valuable ally, my reliable friend, my trustworthy shrink, my amazing bodyguard and my…" _First and only love. _

He couldn't say that. Not here, not now. Not when she was in his arms; not when she felt so nice against him; not when she could run away from his feelings. So instead of telling her, he just hugged her tighter. And she hugged back the same.

"Thank you for caring so much, Roy. I don't think anyone cared this much about me."

"Just… don't die on me. Okay?"

"Is that an order, sir?"

"You know it is, lieutenant."

Eventually the pair untangled themselves with dry faces and fixed themselves up before the others getting there. It had been a good day, for Roy Mustang. A good day, indeed.

After remember that, he turns back to the drunk blonde who was half asleep on the couch. He smiles at her relaxed face.

"Riza?"

"Yesh, sir?"

"How much are you going to remember tomorrow?"

"From pashted experienshes shir, not a lot."

"So you wouldn't remember if I told you that you are the most amazing woman that I have ever met? Or that I have never seen anyone who can look so beautiful even when she's pointing a gun at me? Or that I have been in love with you ever since I met you so long ago at the Hawkeye mansion?" _Holy fuck. Did I really just say that? No, that was in my head. Oh god! It wasn't!_

"Well, shir. If any of it were true, then I might try to remember it. But obviously it isn't."

"Riza, every single word is true. Will you remember?"

"Well, if it ish, than maybe. Maybe you shoulds tell me tomorrow, shir?"

"Ah, but then you may reject me when you have sober mind."

"I would never reject the pershon I love, shir. Never…never" Riza Hawkeye's eyes begin to droop and almost immediately, she falls asleep. _She what? She cant be… There is no way that she… but then again. Drunk words are sober thoughts. I will tell you again, Riza Hawkeye. I will tell you again when I am Fuhrer and I can marry you. Please wait for me. _

He smiles at the blond and gets up, being careful not to wake her. He walks over and kneels beside her head and kisses her on the forehead. She smiles in her sleep.

"Thanks for always being here, Riza." And with that, he covers her in his jacket and makes his way to where the other drunken goofballs are and made sure no one gets hurt on their way to their beds. He was smiling the whole time.

The next morning everyone meets back in his office to give their final words to Edward before he sets off. Most of the females are tearing up, except for Riza who has a stone expression on as she wishes him well. The stone breaks into a smile and she allows a small hug too. Armstrong is crying a water fountain as he crushes Ed with his massive and again, shirtless muscles. Everyone seems sad that he is going, but knows that he must. Everyone slowly leaves until, Riza, Roy and Edward are all that is left.

"Thank you, Colonel Bastard. And yeah, still gunna call you that even if you aren't a Colonel anymore."

"And im still going to call you a pipsqueak." He laughs expecting a beating from Ed but instead Ed starts laughing with him.

"Haha, I guess that's fair. Goodbye, Riza. Thank you. I'll see you guys soon. Don't forget me, kay? Or I'll come kick you asses." He smiles at the pair and turns away, making his way out of the room. _He didn't yell at all? Huh, this kid just can't stop surprising me. Those westerners better watch out. This kid is unpredictable. _

Mustang watches as the 17 year old leaves his office with papers that will let him cross the border, along with money that will pay for a caravan to take him to Rochen after he reaches the center of Creta. He begins to call out the boy's name, but the words die on his lips. "Edward, good luck." Never makes it from his mouth. _He knows. That kid is smart enough now to not need any thing like luck. He better come back in one piece. _He walks out the door and watches Ed walk down the hall and turn out the door. Mustang smiles.

"You know, sir. I think we've all had our share of surprises these past few days. I'm we had that party for Ed. Too bad I don't remember much. Haha." She beings to laugh and Mustang joins her. He turns back to leave for the mess hall to have breakfast and Riza follows close behind. She thinks to herself as they walk. _**An amazing body guard**__ will follow her charge until he doesn't want them anymore. But I'll continue to follow you, Roy. And I'll follow you all the way to the top so that I can finally stand beside you, instead of behind you. _She smiles as she follows Mustang into the mess.

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Sorry if you dont like drunk Riza. But i like her. Review please :)


	5. Done Waiting

__Hey guys! Thanks for reading. Please review. Also, check out my other stories! :)

-Im here to enkindle courage.

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_Typical Ed. He has to say the sweetest thing he's ever said and then hops on a train without even telling me why he's leaving! Typical. So fucking typical! Goddamn it all! _Currently, Winry is taking out her frustrations on a poor piece of metal that she **should** be crafting into automail but instead is turning into a **very **pounded and flat sheet of metal. It's been 2 weeks since Edwards departure from her life and well...the automail can vouch that she is not taking it very well. _He freaking __**proposes **__to me and then doesn't even call in the time he's gone? He didn't even say how long he will be gone or anything! And knowing him, he'll come back for a day and expect me to craft him a new limb from scratch and then he'll leave again. _You can almost hear the piece of metal she's pounding screaming for help as she continues to wail on it. Winry lifts her hammer to hit the metal again, but then freezes mid swing. _He proposed to me. _She hadn't let the thought get to her, because it could have been a misunderstanding on her part and he, infact, did not propose. But before the frustrated mechanic could stop it, a faint blush begins to appear on her face and a small smile forms on her lips. _He actually proposed to me. _Currently, the one people to know that Edward had proposed was herself and Edward. Winry did not want to tell her grandmother in fear that it wasn't a proposal. Sighing to herself, she puts the hammer on her work bench and turns 180 degrees to face away from it. Leaning back she props her elbows on it and lets her legs swing forward. _I hope that idiot is okay. Why did he leave anyway?_

"Well, its obvious isn't it?" Falling out of her seat from fright Winry lets out a shriek. "Oh, did I scare you? I thought you were talking to me?" Winry looks up to see her little grandmother standing by the door way into her workplace.

"What? Did I say that outloud?" _Oh shit. What else did i say outloud? _Winry stands and rubs the back of her neck with her hand, unknowingly smearing grease and oil over it.

"Yes, you did. And you couldn't tell why he left Winry? Come on, your a big girl, you know. "

"He was probably bored of us." Winry looked at the ground, cursing at herself for getting herself into this conversation.

"Winry! Come on! We both know why. I mean, how would you feel if you lost the ability to make automail?" Granny takes out her pipe and frowns at her granddaughter.

"Horrible! I would be completely useless without it!"

"So how do you think Ed feels?"

_He felt useless? But that isn't his fault! He helped around the house! I mean he... he swept the floors and he...did some dishes! Well, he broke most of them. He fixed the roof once! But it still leaked... "_The same i would feel if i couldnt do automail..."Winry mutters quietly. But suddenly she looks up. "So thats why he left? Because he felt useless? But what does he expect to gain from leaving us?"

"I talked with him before he left but he told me..."

"Told you what, gran?"

"Well, Winry, he told me not to tell you." Granny takes a puff from her pipe. "But you know what Winry? Please tell me something. Why do you continue to be like the stay-at-home wife?"

This caught Winry's attention. _Stay-at-home wife? Well, what am I supposed to do? How can I go out and do things when I'm always worried. Since he never thinks to call, I'm not even sure if he's alive half the time. _

"What else am I supposed to do?" Winry leans against the wall and crosses her arms. "It's not like I can follow him, he would get mad at me."

"Since when does Edward Elric scare you?" Granny smirks and walks out of the room, leaving Winry by herself. _He doesn't! I mean… its Ed. __**So why are you still here? **_It was like someone was talking to her inside her head. _I'm here because…because I've always waited for him. __**That's not a very good reason. **__So what? I'm supposed to charge blindly after him? You would probably suggest I head to central and ask around if they've seen him! And then go after him! __**Why not? **__Because….because…_Winry knew she was losing the argument with herself. _I can't just leave Gran by herself! __**She'll be fine, Winry. Why? Are you too scared to actually go out and see the world? **__Winry Rockbell is not scared of anything! __**Then why are you still standing here arguing with yourself?**_ Winry sighs to herself not knowing how to answer that question. She runs after her grandmother.

"Gran!" They meet in the hallway, Winry noticing the smirk on her grandmothers face. "You think I should go after him, don't you?"

"I never said that." She replies.

"But shouldn't I go after him? You think that I should go because I can't stand waiting for him anymore and I worry too much. And you think I should go because I should be able to see the world too and I should be able to experience lots of things. And that I can't stand being away from him anymore!" Winry shouts.

"Winry, I never said that. But I think you have your answer." She takes a puff from her pipe and smirks.

"Well, you're right. I should go after him!" She shouts, grinning to herself. But then stops. _I have no idea where he went. _"But I can't…"

"And why not?"

"I have no idea where he went."

"I think you have some idea. It's Edward Elric. Where would he go to get some help and mooch some money?"

"Well, when he did tell us about his adventures, he did usually start in Central…"

"So get packed and go after that boy!" She smiles at her granddaughter. _This will be good for her. Getting out on her own for a bit will let her grow up. It'll be good for him too, once he realizes he doesn't have to do everything alone. _

"I will." She smiles at her grandmother and runs down the hall to go pack, but stops right before she enters the door. "Thanks, Gran." And she then enters and starts to decide what she'll have to take.

"You're welcome! And don't pack your whole shop! Pack light!"

"I will!" An answer comes back from the bedroom and the grandmother takes another puff from her smoke. _Well, if I'm going to be alone with the dog, it will be like a mini vacation for me as well! _She then strolls down the stairs, humming to herself.

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